2 Things Every Leader Must Do In Tandem

21 May 2 Things Every Leader Must Do In Tandem

Be a great follower.

So today’s post we have titled “What are the two things that every leader must do in tandem to maximize their ability… maximize their effectiveness in being able to influence and impact others.”  And so what we look to do in these posts is to deliver content that allows every and any leader to grow their influence and impact in any environment that they’re leading in whether it’s you’re leading yourself with our six-level leadership series that we coach to, our six level leadership coaching, Level Two leadership is lead by self, Level One is be a great follower.  

So whether you’re leading yourself, or Level Three leading another person, or Level Four, leading others in your home, in your business, in organizations, churches, et cetera, we hope that this information parallels in any environment that you lead in.  So feel free to consume it in a manner in which you lead and those in which you lead.

So what are the two things?  The two things that every leader must do in tandem, that’s what I want to understand is that this concept is that every leader must do these two things in tandem, they must co-exist in order for you to maximize your ability to impact and influence anyone or the most amount of people.  So what are those two things?  Ask great questions and listen…turn my fingers…ask great questions and listen.

So when we look at ask great questions, like what’s a great question?  The number one question that many of my clients ask me is they’ll say “Hey Coach what’s a great question?” Or “Do you have a list of great questions that I can study, that I can keep on hand?”  And I’ll tell them, “No I don’t.”   

What is a great question?   I believe a great question is anything that elicits awareness, action or impact in someone.

Awareness to be the first step of all transformation.

So when we look at awareness, we know awareness to be the first step of all transformation, and when we ask a question that creates awareness that leads to something well guess what?  That was a great question; and the difference between a great question and a good question is good questions just bring information, “How do you spell such and such?”  To me that’s a good question cause it just elicits information.

But if you ask someone a question that can create that thought process where they’re deep in thought and it creates that aha moment, that’s a great question.  If you ask someone a question that elicits the reality of the action that needs to be taken, “What is the one thing you can do such that by doing it will make everything else easier or necessary?”  That’s the clarifying question from the book The One Thing written by Gary Keller and Jay Papason… that’s a great question because it causes someone deep thought that can lead to action.  So if it’s awareness or if it’s a question that causes action or impact in someone.  

Sometimes they come together like if all three can come together then that’s a really great question in my opinion.  But understand this, you should never have a list of great questions.  I’ve come across people that have said “Oh here are my top five great questions… my top 10 great questions,” and here’s the reality, they may be great to you, they may have been great to someone else but we cannot gross generalize all people that all people are affected by the same questions.  

You know that’s also Rebecca’s, you know that goes in line with the be-do-have; and I think that’s a great question, we should always be asking ourselves “Who do I need to be today in order to do what I need to do to have what it is I want to have today?”  Why?  Because I believe it’s going to elicit the awareness, it’s going to elicit action and it’s going to elicit impact that can ultimately influence our day, that collectively can influence our weeks, our months, our years and ultimately our life.  So Rebecca once again my love thank you for adding value to our leadership community.

So the first thing that every leader… every great leader must be able to hone is asking great questions. But here’s the thing, what it must come in tandem with is the ability to listen great….listen great.  You notice God gave you two ears, one mouth… two ears, one mouth?   Do more listening than you do talking.  You see I believe that in the sales world of influence and especially in the leadership world, we’re all looking what’s that next great script?  What’s the conversation that I need to have with people around accountability?  What do I need to say to people?  We all believe that impact and influence happens through selling and telling and it doesn’t, it happens through listening and asking great questions.  You see they must come in tandem, why?  Because I believe there is a process that you ask the good questions to get information, to get an understanding so that you can ask a great question that’s going to elicit awareness both in you… for you and the other person, why?  Because in leadership when you and the other person are on the same page of understanding and awareness that’s when collectively we can rise up together, and from there it starts to actually shape the conversation.  You see conversations are when both people are actively engaged in the exchange of language and there’s a definable purpose of what you’re trying to accomplish.

So when you actually get into that conversation and you’re asking great questions in conjunction with where somebody is trying to go and what’s important to them and the only way you can understand that is through listening, like you ask a question whether good, great, or indifferent; you ask a question, you receive information that processes in your head to cause you to want to either get greater clarity and understanding or to deliver awareness, impact, or action in someone else then you can start to shape your great questions around where they’re at and where they’re trying to go because that’s what great leaders, do help people get what they want, when they want it.  Only way you can do that is ask great questions about what they want, when do they want it and what are the obstacles and opportunities along the way.

See but understand this, that can only happen when you ask the great questions and you listen and then you ask great further questions; not ask a great question, obtain information and start telling somebody what they need to do, that’s not high-level leadership, that’s not maximizing your ability to create influence and impact in someone else.

So that must be why the, “Do you have any questions for us?” part of a job interview is more important than we think.”  Those that are out there building great organizations, great questions is a two-way street, it’s going to reveal to you kind of the psychology and the perspective of the person that you’re hiring.  Why?  Because we all look to hire whatever label we want to put on, A player’s, talent, best matchs, et cetera; it’s going to reveal to you, the questions that they ask you on the job interview is going to let you know what’s important to them and what’s a perspective that they’re coming into this process with.  So understand great questions are the one thing that makes everything else easier or unnecessary in your leadership journey.  

And then the next thing is listening.  Why?  Because listening is going to shape the next question, so it’s a process.  Ask a question, obtain information, process it, for what?  To ask a great question that you know can create awareness, action and impact in someone else.  It starts with asking questions and it’s followed by listening that shapes the next great question that we can ask somebody that really shapes a high-level conversation whereby the impact and the influence happens in others, and quite frankly sometimes it happens for us as the leader too.  Because leaders understand this, if you’re not influenced and impacted by the conversation I believe you didn’t go deep enough, I believe you didn’t ask great questions.  

So those are the two things that must happen in tandem, ask great questions and listening because it’s going to be a shaping process, asking great questions is going to elicit the information, awareness, impact that you need and they need, it’s also going to allow to ask the follow-up questions.

But here’s something I want you guys to take away from this, these are some notes that I wrote about why it’s important to ask great questions, because great questions elicit the information that provide clarity, leadership is about a journey of clarity.  If you don’t have clarity the only thing you have is assumption.  And I want you to take… write this down you leaders that are taking notes, assumptive leadership is leadership fail, meaning if you are operating in assumptions because you lack clarity you are failing as a leader.

Two things, it doesn’t allow someone to feel judged or attacked.  You see people are only judged or attacked by when you say something to them.  I believe this, when you do a sell and tell that’s when people can assume judgment or the feeling of being attacked.  Great questions should not cause someone to feel judged or attacked and it allows them to feel like they’re actually important, that you wanting to know more about them is important to you and it starts to form that trust factor.  But remember this, great questions elicit the information and creates clarity, keeps us out of assumptive understandings because assumptive leadership is a leadership fail.

Great leaders listen well.  

They listen well because they want to know, they want to know what’s important to their people because they’re more concerned about their people and where they want to go than they are about their own significance about what they know.

Let me say that again:  Great leaders listen well because they want to know about their people and what’s important to them more than their own significance and what they know.  You see leaders who want to just sell and tell you everything I believe are trying to serve their own significance and impress you by what they know, because those that run around with knowing everything they want to tell you that because they want to impress you and by impressing you thus serves their own significance.  So understand something, great leadership or great questions and listening, One, creates clarity, keeps you out of assumptive leadership; and Two, builds that trust factor that tells the other person “I want to know more about you; I care about you because I want to be a resource for you to be resourceful to achieve that which you want to achieve.”

You see leaders, you cannot fully influence someone without understanding, without listening, you can’t because you’re not building up to a high level conversation that takes somebody deep to the understanding of what’s really important to them, why it’s important to them, what’s going on in their head.  See the only way you can get in their head is by asking questions that goes through their ears, processes that information, that causes them to speak to you so you in turn can receive it.  And when you understand what influences someone then you can fully influence them.  Without understanding what’s important to them AKA what’s influencing them you cannot maximize your ability to influence people thus impact them in the way they want to be impacted.

Last but not least, when you fail to ask great questions and listen what’s happening is you are not worried about what’s important to them and you’re only there to try and tell them something, which means you have an agenda.  Asking great questions and listening builds trust, creates clarity, keeps us out of assumptive leadership, shows them that we care about them, allows us the opportunity to fully understand what’s influencing them so we can maximize our ability to influence them, and it keeps us out of an agenda-based conversation.  Because when you have an agenda you have to tell someone, and when you’re telling them you’re not asking them, you’re not listening, and you’re showing them what’s important to you is more important than what’s important to them.

So hopefully we’ve brought some value to your life and your business by understanding that the two things that every leader must do, must do in tandem to effectively maximize your ability to influence and impact themselves and other people, ask great questions and listen and allow that to be a process that builds the trust, creates clarity, builds that relationship, keeps us out of assumptive leadership and prevents us from having an agenda and really allows us to understand what’s influencing our people so that we can influence them.

So thank you for joining me today, I hope that our community can add value to others so that together interdependently we can all grow and achieve a greater level of impact, influence and success in our lives together.  So thank you for joining me today, remember one thing, God loves you, so do I.  Lead strong and have an impactful day.  Have a great day!

About the author:

Over the course of 8 years, Christopher Hart went from an enlisted Private First Class to a Commissioned Officer-Captain. In 2005, Christopher chose to move on from his military career to focus on starting a family and embarking in the world of entrepreneurship. Christopher’s passion is now working to help others be the BEST version of themselves and helping them Lead others to the same!

To learn more about Christopher Hart or to get in touch with him regarding a coaching program you can email him at Chris@TransformingLivesCoaching.com